Monday, December 15, 2014

Scrubs

Last Summer, I was scrubbing my cheeks with baking soda in the shower (like ya do) and thought, Yes. The whole world must know immediately about my skin care regimen.

Since that day, I've had the idea about 8,000 times, but there are two roadblocks to telling this story, and the first would be my Eyebrow Ditches.

You have fine lines. I have two perpendicular creases from years of squinting into the sun, even when it isn't even shining. Even when I'm wearing sunglasses. They say brown eyes are supposed to be the tough brutes of all the irises, but if that's true, why did I once sit in that giant robot chair and explain to my optometrist, "My eyes smell my mascara and it bothers them." (Just, why?)

A few years ago my sister and I were marveling about how wrinkle-free we were. I'm not even playing right now. If you have a sister, you know this is legal. One month later I turned 34 and overnight, many parts of me revolted. My face seized up, only the opposite. I became one of the wrinkled ones.

And in case you're worried now, no, I do not have body dysmorphic disorder. I know what this is because in Abnormal Psychology I had to "diagnose" my friend who thought he was bald, but actually wasn't.

The point is, it seemed that only someone with flawless skin or should yammer about her face scrubs. Meanwhile, I have a history of clogged pores, oily skin, saggy eyelids, and that weird cluster of something by my left eye that causes people to sometimes ask "What happened??!"

The second roadblock: Jesus.

This is embarrassing, okay? It's complicated in my head. As you may have noticed, my blog enjoys a scattered whimsical vibe. At some point I made the unconscious non-decision to not back myself into a corner, which results in me baring my guts about poverty and adoption and God one day and talking about brussels sprouts the next. It's confusing even for me. I have friends who say their top priority is to honor God with every word they write, and I nod along, but now and then I feel a visceral itch to emotionally purge my crushiest movie stars* (during the Advent season oh my gosh) or my first world J Crew problems and I'm left feeling like Jesus probably scrolls pasts me in his reader on those days.

It's true, I was created with a bent toward loving products. My adolescent dream job was to work at a drug store so I could memorize the mysteriously weird names of make-up colors all day. Yes, I did once write a letter to the editor of Teen Magazine airing my grievance that they didn't include recipes on how to make make-up from household products, but you know this embarrasses me, so why are you bringing it up???? (They didn't respond.) It felt like a major blow when I was eventually hired at Meijer only to be sent to the shoe department rather than HBA (if you don't know what that means, I'm shocked you're still even reading).

Shannan Martin is wrought with complexity, this much we know, but a post about janky skin care products? NO ONE CARES, ESPECIALLY NOT JESUS.

Or does He? All I can tell you is, last week I got an email from a reader asking what skin care products I use and it might as well have been a dove with an olive branch in its beak or a burning bush. 

So if you're wondering why God hasn't answered your prayers recently, it's because He's been busy coordinating my blog schedule and considering the lilies of my pores. So to speak.

Kidding.

Since we can't even handle any more ado, here is my skin care regimen, or as I like to accidentally say, my "skin care regime." (If, like me, you grew up on a cocktail of blue Noxzema, Apricot scrub from the devil, and the blue Sea Breeze, "regime" actually makes perfect sense.)

I scrub my face most mornings in the shower with a little bit of baking soda, sometimes mixed with a drop of Maddie & Sophie Cleanse oil. Lauren Conrad told me to do this and because baking soda is cheap and I have an affinity for reality TV stars who retained their common sense, I listened. It changed my life. In a way.

At night, I wash my face with some generic version of the Oily Skin version of Cetaphil.

After that, I rub a few drops of Maddie & Sophie "skin" oil all over my face.
WHAT?

Yes, I have oily skin and my life was forever changed by skin oil. It balances my pores in a magical way and it also somehow keeps them from getting that gross, clogged way. I have always been prone to break-outs (and still sometimes am) but this has never caused me trouble, and if you would have told me about this trickery when I was a teenager, I would have spit in your hair.

Note: both Maddie & Sophie products were given to me as a gift from a friend, so I did not personally pay for them. They aren't cheap. BUT. 1) They last forever (my first bottles lasted exactly one year) 2) They give me results that renew my faith in possibility and hope 3)They're certified organic, gluten-free, and totally natural and 4) the "cleanse" smells like an orange Dreamsicle.

Note: "cleanse" is currently sold-out but will be available again in January. AND...Maddie and Sophie is giving one bottle away to an FPFG reader. Just leave a comment telling me anything in the world about a product you love. Or, just say Hi. I'm easy. I'll pick a random winner sometime in the next week.

Rounding out my faves: this Nivea lip balm. I am allergic to going to bed with dry lips, and this gives a tiny hint of rosy color, so I use it in the morning, too, when I'm trying to be extra fancy as I take my kids to school in my pajamas.

I grabbed the Lacura night cream a couple weeks ago at Aldi. I loved their eye cream because it smelled like honeysuckle. This doesn't grab me in quite the same way, but it's nice to switch it up every now and then.

My "look".
(Can we call it that?? Please?)
Sloppy ponytail, a little bit of make-up, doing selfies on the front porch with our oldest son, Robert, in his #BITE ME hat. Naturally.

I do wish my lips were voluptuous enough to cover my gums, but  I don't hate my skin. Guys, I'm practically 40! Hand to heart, my skin is in better shape than it was 5 years ago. Amen. (If anyone knows the antidote to a fivehead, please approach the podium.)

These are my go-to make-up skin products du jour.

That Wet 'N Wild (576A - Rose Gold) lipgloss will rock your face off. It's so wrong, it's right.
At first you don't know what even got into you and why you're carrying its frosty self around.
Then you notice the way it makes you seem like you have a little bit of a tan even in December and you pledge your eternal love.

NYX concealer and blush are both from Target (I like a brighter blush. Sue me.) The ribboned Oil of Olay skin corrector concealer has been discontinued but I need it so bad that I hawked an arm and bought it on Ebay for nearly $20. (When it arrived with an orange clearance sticker on the lid, I raged.)

I discovered that Ben Nye banana powder on Pinterest with one of those before/after shots and ordered it without blinking twice. I don't always use it because I'm happy with a combination of the other two, but sometimes I sweep a layer of it over the other two when I'm looking extra terrifying or when I care more than usual, whichever comes first.

What I'm trying to say is, I'm not an extravagant, impulsive shopper at all, except when it comes to covering my dark circles that would frighten a seasoned Celtic warrior.

While we're on the topic of some of my personal, appearance-related flaws "quirks", let's talk about the fact that I have the hair follicles of a hairless cat.

This was in my swag bag when I spoke last year at Hope Spoken and it changed my flipping life.
Fine-haired ladies? Meet your lover. It sprays out like invisible air, but somehow makes you look like you aren't going bald after all. It's the literal breath of angels. Literally.

I'm afraid of how much it actually costs...hold me, it's $32! But I still have one arm left, and I will buy a replacement can of this mythical hair product in the near future.


I recently had $10 of my monthly "Blow" (thinking spending cash, not drugs) burning a hole in my pocket and these small body butters from The Body Shop were on sale 3/$10. Boom. My favorite scents are (from bottom) Satsuma, Pink Grapefruit and Olive Oil, which actually smells like legitimate spring, not an Italian ristorante.


Finally, for the man in my life and maybe yours, this Mr. Beardsmith beard oil. Because guys, I don't know how to tell you this, but Cory is growing his beard again. We'll all survive. I'm sure we will.

On a positive note, this oil will make it more manageable and more deliciously scented (#7 is my fave), as proven on the beards of many of our bearded friends. And it's just $12 a bottle. (Use the code FPFG15 at check-out for an extra 15% off through the end of December!!!)

If your husband or boyfriend or brother has gifted follicles, this would be the perfect Christmas gift.

There you have it. Everything you ever wanted to know about something you wanted to know nothing about at all.

We can all agree, this was God's work.

Question: What's your go-to product? I truly and sincerely want to talk about ALL OF THEM.
Tell me something in the comments for your chance to win the magical "cleanse" oil!

Also, bless you forever for making it through this monster post.
Happy Monday.

*this is begging to be updated

129 comments:

  1. Mascara is my go to! I have fair eyelashes, so I feel like I look completely different if I don't wear that :)

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  2. Hi. I'm easy.

    seriously, would love to try anything for adult acne, because, please, it needs to end before menopause.

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  3. Oil on oily skin is terrifying. I want to believe you. I'm just not sure I can.

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    1. Be changed! Be healed! It is magic.
      I heard it described that oil dissolves oil, and a friend of mine just confirmed this. It makes no sense at all, which is you'll have to take my word for it. Have I ever let you down before??

      Don't answer that.

      Truth is, when I don't put some on before bed, I wake up a much greasier mess. MAGIC!!

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  4. 'the hair follicles of a hairless cat' - Ha! that one made me choke on my coffee. I am in desperate need of the breath of angels too.

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  5. I liked reading this! I especially like that you mentioned the Aldi stuff, because I'm devoted to Aldi but afraid of the cosmetics. Now I'm not so afraid!

    I lack serious self discipline in the skin care department. I'm 36, so I feel like I should really step up my game so I don't look like a train wreck as I continue to age. I feel like my new year's resolution will be self care which is pathetic and good at the same time...

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  6. I love my Mary Kay face lotion but sheesh I feel like I have to save up for it! I will be trying your dark eye concealer magic because, in my mind, that is worth it's weight in gold (specially with a newborn in the house!!)

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  7. I grew up with the Noxema, Apricot scrub and the blue Seabreeze - so funny to think about that now!! I too have fine hair and will be checking out that spray!

    Cheryl @ The Creative Me and My McG

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  8. My go to product is Bumble and bumble hair powder in brown because it is the only dry shampoo that doesn't leave my dark, thin locks looking like a bottle of baby powder was dumped on my head. With 4 littles at home, dry shampoo is one of my bffs. It costs my 2 arms, but Sephora gives me free shipping and amazing samples so I keep going back for more.

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  9. I hate breakouts but I love popping pimples. I'm complex too!!! Pick me!!!!

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  10. HI~ I wear such little make up that when I forget to 'put my face on' for work...NO ONE Notices...HA!

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  11. One of my favorite things right now is goat milk soap, especially if it is scented with lavender. BUT, it costs $7 for a bar, so occasionally I splurge. I have miniature goats in my backyard and it's probably time for me to just figure out how make my own goat soap, but with toddler twin boys, no time for that :)

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  12. I picked up NYX concealer when you first wrote about it. Affordable and does a great job!

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  13. I like doves dry hair shampoo cause who showers everyday.

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  14. It was meant to be - this morning I am agonizing over trying some different skin care products for my oily skin that, at 33 years old, I still have!! Greasy disgusting face in the morning, check! Proactive is what I use and the cost pains me. Also, for the first time in our 9 1/2 years of marriage, my husband's facial hair follicles have decided to actually behave as he once again tried to grow a beard a few months ago and lo and behold, the angels descended and it took off! I'm hoping we stop before duck dynasty calls to check on him as a possible brother. Thank you for having oily skin!! I am not alone in this fight!

    And on a serious note, speaking of other ways you have changed me, your money posts and your adoption posts have changed my life and sparked major discussions with my husband and me. And his beard.

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  16. HI! I have had issues with oily/dry/nasty skin too, but I started using the "oil cleansing method" a few years ago. I was surprised and delighted how much it helped my skin! I use a half dollar size of sunflower oil + a drop of castor oil to clean my face at night. Bonus - it removes ALL eye makeup so easily! My essential oil friends have almost convinced me to add a little tea tree oil to the mix for the antifungal/antimicrobial/antibacterial/antiallgerms benefits. I swab my face with witchhazel in the morning, and I'm good to go. :)

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  17. I lol'd about 6 times reading this. FIVEHEAD! love it! I also almost fell over when you mentioned Aldi's lacura nighttime moisturizer - love it. I also use it in the morning too (gasp) because the scent is so much more delightful than their daytime cream.

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  18. i have no magical remedies. i have lotsa chin zits that never go away. i might have one day without a zit in one whole entire year. i do use melaleuca skin products (a natural company - my granny orders them for me. bless her.) and they helped for awhile, but its almost like they quit working. but i haven't lost all faith in them (yet).

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  19. I have been meaning to share this with you...I converted to "washing" my face with coconut oil morning and night. Slather it on and wipe it off with warm washcloth. My skin is the happiest it has been in years. I throw in a little coarse sugar once a week to slough off the dead stuff. (I just used slough in a sentence).

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  20. He does care. You delight Him!
    I am also a fan of the baking soda. And you can use oatmeal for a scrub if you want more exfoliation!

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  21. I am so glad to see that there are other 30-somethings out there who still suffer with acne! My go-to product right now is African Black Soap. My skin is now the closest it has ever been to being clear. Oil for oily skin? Sounds scary, but I'm willing to try anything at this point in my life.

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  22. i LOVED reading all of your recommendations! i definitely want to try to baking soda.
    i can match you your lines between your eyes...i have them, too...PLUS a scar in the middle that makes it look like this: \_/, except flipped upside down. it's awesome.
    i got my hair cut this summer and got coerced into buying this product that i was so MAD about the minute i stepped foot outside the door. but you know what?!? i LOVE it! it TRULY calms my crazy hair down - it's called "it's a 10" and you spray it on your hair when it's wet. good stuff.

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  23. I'm going to try coconut oil for washing/moisturizing and return the overpriced age defying cream that i just bought! I didn't even know that Aldi had night cream. It's on my list for next visit. I love when we ladies share tried and true.
    My new fave product is the eyebrow kit from e.l.f. ($3!)

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  24. oh, oh! pick me! love beauty products too and looking for the next great thing for my "mature"/35 YO skin.

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  25. I love the Clinique line of cleaners, toners, and moisturizers, but am too thrifty to pay for it. Perhaps I'll give the baking soda a go!

    And that lip balm is adorable. Need it!

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    Replies
    1. WalMart's Equate line now has a dupe of Clinique's 3-step system. They only have one formula (the middle one, I think), but you might check it out.

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  26. I'm loving a new skincare line at CVS by Salma Hayek. (If it could make me look anything like her, I'm sold!) It makes my skin feel good and seems more gentle than other products I've used.

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  27. Yes! I hit 30 and my skin decided to freak out, stop exfoliating and develop wrinkles. I finally discovered that gentle exfoliation with an Alpha Hydroxy a couple times a week helped tremendously, especially if I use generic Cetaphil and then (here's the trick) wipe it off with a dry washcloth twice a day. While pregnant I couldn't use the AHA so I hated my skin for months until I tried Mario Badescu's Glycolic wash and fell in love. $15. Lasts forever. I also switched to straight oils for moisture, either grapeseed or almond, and I barely ever have breakouts now. Oils totally balance my skin out.

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  28. The struggle I have with oily skin is real - real annoying! I am going to have to give this oil magic a try! (and if there are now two comments from me, forgive me - my computer has been acting up today!)

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  29. Eye liner and mascara -- otherwise, ugh. I do swear by Clinique's moisturizer though. Use it before I put on my makeup and sometimes at night if I feel dry.

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  30. Maddie! Sohie! SOS! Get in my life!!

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  31. Okay, maybe my third attempt at commenting will be the charm. ;) At any rate, add me to the team of dubious but hopeful women with oily skin! Ever since babe #3 came along, my skin seems to be convinced I'm back in high school. I'm pretty sure I've never in my life had so many breakouts and pimples along my cheeks/chin/jawline - so not fair. Currently adding said magical mystery potion to my "please put this in my stocking!" list!

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  32. Girl, look at how many comments you have! Obviously we all are interested in your beauty regime. I too suffer from the oily skin/occasional acne, and it feels so cruel to still have this problem in my thirties. I am intrigued by the Maddie/Sophie oil and also by the baking soda.

    I've been wanting to try Everyday Minerals for makeup. I'm out of blush and my powder is nearing the end, so I think I may splurge in the new year and new budget month and try it out.

    Don't hate me, but I have the opposite hair prob. SO MUCH HAIR; it takes at least 20 minutes to straighten it, at least 30-40 to curl it. Which promptly falls out. Maybe I could give you some and we could meet in the middle.

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    1. OH! And most importantly, I wanted to say that I have the EXACT same internal struggle when it comes to blogging certain things. I got ya. But I loved this post.

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  33. This was one of your funniest posts ever!! I loved the apriot scrub comment ( I so remember those 3 beauty staples) but I loved the idea of washing my face with baking soda. I will be trying this asap. You have Beautiful skin, so the proof is in the pudding :)

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  34. I am loving Origins Vitazing lately... so good. Easy, light, friendly on the face... good.

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  35. Lip Smackers (Strawberry for every day, Dr. Pepper for special occasions...because it has a little color).

    That picture of you and Robert is all that is right with the world.

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  36. I, too, am allergic to going to bed without chapstick on!

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  37. And here I thought I was the only one who cannot sleep without a fresh application of chapstick. I lay there licking my lips, unable to sleep, until I get some. My mom always had Dew Kiss lip gloss from Avon when I was growing up so the smell of it immediately makes me think of her and being a child again.

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  38. I love this post! I hope I win :) I can't live without BabyLips by Maybelline.

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  39. i think these kinds of posts are really helpful - especially for women like me who hardly wear any makeup or spend much time on skin care products. we can get away with all that when we're young but...lets face it at 35 it's time to start doing something anti-aging but im so out of the loop on what women my age are doing!! fpfg to the rescue!!

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  40. Hi, I enjoyed this post! I now have an interest in adding a regime to my schedule! We'll see how long that lasts! I would love to try out the freebie!

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  41. have you put coconut oil on your face? because it will change your actual life. i too acquired a bottle of that hairspray at hope spoken last year and i wanted to love it, but it smelled terrible.does yours smell too? i still have the whole bottle. i will mail it to you if you want it. can you believe how nice i am.

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  42. I really think it is important to use things on your face with natural products. I have been using BOOM products . Still looking for the perfect products. You have beautiful skn.

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  43. I just started oiling my oily skin about a year ago and YES! My skin is much better than it was a year ago. I am 39. I use http://www.kitnaturals.com/ hydrating cream. IT'S NATURAL!!

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  44. Ok here goes a third try.
    Facial products I have used for a long time. Epionce from Oregon. Gentle wash. It is very low cost 32.00 a bottle and lasts a year.
    Aveeno ultra calming foaming wash and creme.
    Coconut oil as a moisturizer in the shower but be careful it is slippery. I am a week from being 60 have no wrinkles in my face and have been told I look 40 something. Good products and a glass of red wine every night helps in staying healthy.

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    Replies
    1. OH and I also use Origins makeup, the liquid and powder.

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  45. I loved this post! Thank you for posting it.

    My fave product is Origin's Checks and Balances cleanser. It was a game changer for my adult acne.

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  46. girl, i'm 8 years ahead of you, and i have SERIOUS ditches! i'm still prone to semi-oily skin and the occasional tiny zitter or two at just the time of the month when i'm already feeling great about myself. it's just something that you have to go with because they're the hormones God gave you!

    i too would've spit on your hair if you'd told me about skin OIL when i was in high school. seriously? i'm still a bit of a skeptic, which is why i hope your random comment generator picks me. i'd also like to know how you store your baking soda in or near your shower so that it doesn't turn into a solid lump due to exposure to moisture. these are burning questions!

    one more random thing: i wear a ball cap 5 hours a day while making various coffee drinks at my Starbucks. my head used to itch and itch and itch in the same vacinity where the hat hugged my head--by my ears, if that helps. ANYWAY, after years of this, a friend casually mentioned that she had switched to gluten-free shampoo and her hair stopped falling out. now, mine wasn't falling out, but because i'm following a gluten-free diet, i thought there might be a connection. BAM! there was! my head doesn't itch anymore, and Whole Foods and Aldi both carry inexpensive gluten-free shampoos!

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  47. I wash my face with a handmade organic safflower oil soap from Sun Gold. It is the only soap we use all over the house. At bedtime I use Lubriderm Fragrance Free lotion on face and hands. People often tell me how good my skin looks for being 50 something. I worked with a natural healthcare practitioner to clean up my tummy issues and I never have breakouts anymore. The face shows what is going on in the gut.

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  48. Cetaphil generic like yours and coconut oil, only at night. In a.m., just apply makeup without washing, because due to rosacea my skin is too sensitive without the oil, but too oily with it just applied! Call me crazy - works for me!

    Heidi

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  49. I am feeling your pain over the discontinued Olay, but I recently tried a L'Oreal Blur product that is just as satisfying ...you may want to try a sample...it is as light as the Olay concealer and provides good coverage.

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  50. Your skin is BEAUTIFUL! I have the opposite problem--very dry, aging skin. I wonder if the Maddie & Sophie products might help me.....

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  51. Thanks for all the insight I might just have to try baking soda in the shower or coconut oil like many people in the comments suggested.

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  52. I've just gotta try that oil! How's that for simple? 8)

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  53. Let's talk about baby powder & it's magic for this gal who rarely (every 6 days on a good week?!) washes her hair. I'm disgusting, I know. ;)

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  54. I am an old woman (62) and have given up on trying to get rid of the wrinkles. I have used everything over the years and now I just use Ponds moisturizer (as an old woman would) and it seems to work really well and add the needed moisture to old lady dried skin. But I still wash morning and night with Purity from Philosophy. I love it and will never give it up. By the way your skin looks great and I think you are a little doll!

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  55. Aveeno tinted moisturizer with sunscreen! And a little mascara. Thats all I know how to use. Need something for neck wrinkles and black under-eyes..they seem to be here to stay :( hope I can win your magic stuff!

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  56. Obviously we cared about your health and beauty regiment! Look at all of the comments! Baking Soda is here to stay! My dad always brushed his teeth with it and my brother mixed it with water for indigestion. It cleans sinks, removes stains and odors and no telling what else. I must now try it as a scrub with hopes of looking as youthful and beautiful as you! You are loved!

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  57. I love when people will kind of laugh-off my talk about having a five head, and then, at 32, I still place all my fingers and thumb up there to prove it. I am wondering to myself why I had to actually show the, every time. :)

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  58. I love what Natalie said above about baby powder. It gets me through the 3rd day after a shampoo. I have a lot of deep lines for a 44-year old, so I'd really love to fix that miraculously!

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  59. I also have had oily blemishy skin (and I'm well past menopause and still break out) Best thing I've done is use the generic acne wash (I think it's Acnefree) mixed with sugar to make a stiff paste. It's a wonderful scrub in the shower each morning and I don't break out. The wash doesn't smell like anything so I add a few drops of grapefruit and orange essential oil. It wakes me up in the morning and I'm completely addicted.

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  60. Firstly, you are COMPLETELY right about the oil. I've been using every kind of noxious, minted-burning, foul scrubbery around since I hit puberty and it's all wrong- the right moisture totally tames the greasies. Amazing!

    I wash with Neutrogena Clear Pore Cleanser/Mask $6 and cold water. Mario Badescu Drying Lotion is $17 but lasts forever (I have a bottle that is criminally old and still works a charm!) Maybelline Dream Lumi Touch Concealer $7 is the best thing for eyes and highlighting.

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  61. How do you get your baking soda in the shower without losing it or getting it all wet?? I use Vaseline on my eyes instead of eye cream. Inexpensive and lasts forever!

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  62. I'm SUPER into Origins moisturizer with a tint. (White tube with orange lid) It's pricy, but it lasts a long time, has no yucky ingredients, and the tint kind of takes on your natural skin color only a little more tan, (tanner, tannier?) Almost like a light foundation, only you can still touch your face without messing it up. (But, I actually wouldn't know much about foundation because I don't wear it, even though I should.)

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  63. Pretty sure I NEED that hairspray...for reals.

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  64. Neutrogena rain bath actually works like amazing. But it's pricey:(

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  65. I might have to try that baking soda trick. I don't have oily skin but this sounds like it would feel good.

    Now, that Wet n Wild gloss? I'm a gloss snob but will for sure try this! I splurged on the $1.99 long last lipstick over the summer and it is fantastic. I'll spend big bucks on good lip products (I, too, adore Nivea lip pots and tubes) but am always on the hunt for cheap.

    Thanks for sharing!

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  66. I want to try this magical oil you speak of!

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  67. Hello

    I looked up Maddie and Sophie products and can't wait to try the face oil!

    My fav go to product is the Lemon body oil from Burts Bees, add to the bath or apply as lotion, awesome stuff!

    Heather

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  68. 1. once freshly showered (and i am TOTALLY going to try the baking soda trick), i apply lotion (the vaseline brand all-body kind) to my face. only the face. the non-face parts of my body curl up in a corner and sulk, bc the face feels tight and dry and unhappy and therefore gets the goods, and then i run out of time/gumption. everyplace else just has to deal.

    2. sometimes i also apply almay eyeliner, in black, and then promptly smudge (read: unapply) it with a bushy Qtip.

    3. if i'm having an Extra Fancy Day, i brush a layer of neutrogena powder all over my face-ish parts. i don't think it actually Helps Anything, but it has a decent placebo effect.

    4. and then i come home 2 hours later and wash the whole thing off because there's this FEEL of makeup on my skin and i just can't. it's weird how no one ever asks about my beauty regimen/regime.

    ps SOFTLIPS. i almost forgot the most important guy! raspberry is my favorite, vanilla is okay.
    pps someday i might learn how to be an actual female. we shan't give up hope. :)

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    1. Soft Lips for the win! Is that the white skinny tube? Yes?

      Also, please stop making me miss you.

      Also also, if we all looked like you we'd all tool around sans make-up.

      Delete
  69. As a fellow shiny skin girl, I'm so happy to read this post! Would love to win anything that would whip my pores into shape!!! :)

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  70. Coconut oil is my BFF. I slather it everywhere and the little left on my hands gets distributed thru the ends of my long hair.

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  71. I tried the baking soda this morning..but do you make a paste? I love jojoba oil!

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  72. Oily girls, the oil is your friend. Check out DHC Skincare. It's super affordable and the cleansing oil will transform you. Also, the products at acne.org are very reasonable and the only thing that truly ended my acne. The aha cream is a must have and will help tremendously with wrinkles as well as acne. Love your offbeat posts the most!!

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  73. LOVED THIS POST! (Though, I cant't lie… every single one is uplifting and wildly entertaining:)) I can't WAIT to try the baking soda and will dream at night of the Fave 4 along with the Sugar Plums until I am able to get some! Bless you!

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  74. Magic for the face? Count me in!! Sounds Dee-Vine!

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  75. When Hope Is Not Enough Serum. Love it! I actually found two unopened bottles at the Salvation Army a few months ago. Was in complete shock. Sure, it might have been ten years old, but hey, it's working just as good as the expensive new bottles I have purchased.

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  76. Neutrogena Revitalizing Lip Balm in Healthy Blush...I stockpile it.

    Love this post for so many reasons!

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  77. ive been washing my face with Dove for years and i think its great. my skin looks pretty good if i say so myself at 41. of course regular (when its not cold) exercise and the fact ive never worn makeup other than Benetint on my cheeks probably helps too. oh...and WATER drinks Lots of Water! keeping tabs on this post to share with friends

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  78. Oh, and thank you for your always and ever honesty, even about skin care regimes!

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  79. I use baking soda occasionally to whiten my teeth but never thought about as a scrub for my face..great idea!! Also, I too wear the Wet & Wild Rose Gold..LOVE it! Thanks for sharing:))

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  80. I'm so glad that I'm not the only one that frets about my skin and yet, doesn't feel the need to invest my life savings in it. I LOVE when I can find a product that won't break the bank and does just fine. I'm *still* a blue noxema & blue seabreeze girl (pushing 50). My moisturizer has been everything from ponds to now "burts bees" but about 9 mo. ago, my face started revolting. I never had horrendous acne growing up, have been blessed with 95% clear skin my adult life but dang! for whatever reason, I began having breakouts like nobody's business,. and pretty continual ~ I've read about face-mapping (very intriguing as to where your breakouts occur and what the likely causes are), "aging" skin , ahem & "adult acne". . . it seems that when September arrived, the breakouts mysteriously vanished. . . on the flip side, my skin was so darn dry. . .break out the burts bees carrot day cream to moisturize my sandpaper forehead and while that is happy with burt, the rest of my face isn't & the breakouts have commenced once again. I'm waving my white flag here! Would love to try the cleanse oil & took notes on the other products. We won't even begin to discuss the "laugh lines" ha ha ha (see! laughing!)

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  81. I'm from the same nosema crowd along with that blue tingly acid wash! Funny:)

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  82. Thanks for introducing us to Maddie and
    Sophia -all the products sound lovely. Sweet that she named her company after her grandmothers. :)
    Loved your post as usual.

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  83. Oh, Noxema and Seabreeze...what a walk down memory lane!

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  84. I wash my face with honey.

    Yes really. Just honey. No moisturizers or other creams. It's local. It's cheap. It's easy. It's been almost two years and my skin has never looked better. It's like magic.

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  85. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  86. My "go-to" product... My "I SO can't live without" ... My "even when I''m not going anywhere but can't stand it not in my hair" is... Aquage up-lifting foam. I have been addicted to it for 2 years and will actually die if they ever quit selling it! Ha! BTW... Hate, hate, HATE paying for it... But I want to live, so I just do it!

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  87. I want to win the oil because I AM oil...
    When I go to the chiropractor and he rearranges all my back bones, I gotta lie on that table with the face hole. And the face hole is covered by the exam table paper. When I get up, my back feels better but the paper looks like Mary Magdalene's cloth when she wiped the face of Jesus.

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    1. This is the funniest comment in the history of FPFG. I laughed out loud, to my bowl of spaghetti.

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  88. Nearing 40! I need some help in the skin care department, thanks for your encouragement!

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  89. Ack! I admit it! I am addicted to all things cosmetic.

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  90. I just turned 40 on Friday & oh my word, this post is so timely with my current skin curiosities!

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  91. Girl...I gotta just say - you crack me up! I think we have the same hair, so I'm definitely trying the FAVE 4 hair stuff & definitely will check out the Maddie & Sophie oils - thanks for the run down on your routine & products. It's fun to try new stuff & I don't know anyone who doesn't use something. I heard an old preacher say once, "If your house needs paintin' - paint it!" Amen :) My definitely does.

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  92. I have started washing my face with Apricot Oil. That is it! I was using Jojoba Oil but now only Apricot Oil. It works pretty good and leaves my face so soft. I would just love to use the Maddie and Sophie oil. It would just be cool because my daughter's name is Sophie and I have only wished to get some of their products. That would be a great Christmas present! I love reading your words, BTW! You inspire me!

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  93. I'm older than you but SO did Noxzema and Sea Breeze as a teenager. And have you found a solution to your mascara probs? 'Cause my eyes are sensitive, too, and everything just turns into a smudged mess. I need help! I have oily skin still in my 50s but have had the between the eyes wrinkle forever and now have forehead wrinkles. Bangs would cover those, but, dang it, for once in my adult life those are grown out. NYX Shine Killer helps some with the oiliness. Ben Nye powder (I haven't tried Banana yet) and elf HD powder are my current faves.

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  94. I love and use coconut oil for everything and can't go to bed without Chapstick. Eos is my favorite!

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  95. Ha! I've been a Wet N Wild Rose Gold fan for years. Thought I was the only one. My other favorite product is Physicians Formula Organic CC Cream. It takes away all the evidence of my teenage tanning bed stupidity.

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  96. I have such the opposite problem, my skin is alligatorish...dry I tell ya! Tryna figure out the best lotion to buy for reptilians like myself.

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  97. Trying the baking soda NEXT SHOWER. ((Which, if I'm honest, might not be for a while...eep))
    You have beautiful skin- thanks for sharing your "regime"! I am only 25, and I am already starting to shrivel a bit, thanks to my blasted dry skin. (And maybe thanks to the fact that I currently lack anything that could be called a skincare regimen). But alas- you have inspired me to repent and change my ways. Thank you for doing this hallowed work.
    ;)

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  98. Thanks for sharing!!! I can't wait to try some of these tips and products! I LOVE elf bronzer and their ruby red lipstick. I also use the equate brand of olay night time cream and it's wonderful! Also vaseline, just a big ol tub of it! I use it for lotion on my legs and hands and it makes THE best lipglos ever! Try it at night if you can't stand dry lips :)

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  99. Gotta try the baking soda soon! I've been using a mixture of olive oil and castor oil for cleansing my face. I like how soft it leaves my skin.

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  100. I would love to win this for my Aunt!! I love your blog btw!! You crack me up lol:)

    Happy Holidays & thanks for the chance to win!

    Joey J.

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  101. youre awesome! I am a sucker for "what I use" beauty product posts. I always want to buy it all! OH and I would love that oil on my face ;)

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  102. Hi, there. My beauty products range from baking soda for facial cleanser to Argan oil for afterwards, to a really expensive product I purchased from Sam's Club on a whim. What I'm really looking for is a miracle to remove the wrinkles creeping over my eyes & forehead but realistically, I'm happy just to have skin :~} !!

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  103. The baking soda intrigues me as do the oils! I recently switched to Bare Minerals and love how light it feels, yet it can still cover crazy breakouts.

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  104. ooo, I want to hear more about the baking soda/oils! And I love coconut oil for both my hair (as a conditioning mask about once a month) and for my dry winter skin. So awesome, and lasts forever.

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  105. Sometimes the best blog posts are ramblings ;) at least, I enjoy reading your words.
    Ponds skin cream has been a lifesaver for my skin. My skin is yucky (dry, oily, etc!). It takes care of the dry patches and doesn't overload the oily parts.
    I also started using the wrinkle cream from the same brand (I can't believe I'm at that point -- yikes). It's super helpful! And I only bought it for $2!

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  106. I'm a fan of the baking soda, too! Plus, I definitely partook in the Noxema-apricot scrub-Sea Breeze regime!

    At 39, I STILL get breakouts, but I hear oily skin doesn't develop wrinkles as much :) I've used Cetaphil and even OCM (oil-cleansing method) but honestly, good ol' Dove bar soap is what works best for my skin. Then I use Thayer's Witch Hazel (the Rose Petal scent is heavenly!) and then some moisturizer with sunscreen (usually Neutrogena). At night I use a night moisturizer that's heavier; it's some generic grocery-store brand. I've used all kinds of creams and potions over the years, and sometimes the tried-and-true ones that have stood the test of time are the best, if not the most fashionable. I say go with what works for your skin.

    My hair on the other hand is beyond hope. I just let it hang down straight and stringy as it refuses to do anything other than that no matter how much time I spend on it.

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  107. I can't live without American Crew forming cream. I have short hair and it gives it chunky texture without feeling like I've slathered my head in cooking oil, or making it stiff like my 80s bangs. As for my face, well that needs some help. I'll try some of your tips and see how they work for me. And this has to be God's work, no lies. If he cares about the grass, doesn't he care about my face? ;)

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  108. Your skin does look so dang radiant in the photo with Robert that I clicked the link and added the face oil to my cart. I had to then quickly close the tab and instead try to win a bottle first. My favorite cover up for those vertical valleys that reside between my brows: BANGS!

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  109. I don't have great skin and I'm super dry WITH oily spots. So I spent (out of my husband's account, ha!) waaaaaaay too much on products to lighten my old sunspots/pregnancy mask. But I knew I couldn't keep that up! Sooooo I started to put frankincense (neat) right on the dark spots. I kid you not....it lightened my spots AND my whole face!!!! ❤️

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  110. Love my Mary Kay eye cream...but want to try some Rodan and Fields products eventually- since I seem to have a facebook feed explosion of people I know selling it! :) this oil sounds amazing and would love to try it (I am prone to breakouts too- boo!) also, now I am terrified to turn 34...wrinkles awaiting on the other side!!! -Lael Nafziger

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  111. I have had a similar post in my head for ages. My new favorite is the serum bar from lush. It is organic and has changed my life. Or at least my face. Come see me and I'll take you there. It's just down from anthro...
    Can't wait to check out some of your faves.

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  112. Love you! Dry shampoo has definitely changed my life!

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  113. I've totally heard of the oil on your face thing, but have never tried it. I've been breaking out like crazy the last year or so for some reason, so I would love to try these products!

    Emily Headings

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  114. Sold me at "smells like an orange Dreamsicle"...

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  115. At the risk of sounding super hippie or mentally unstable, one of my fave skin products is raw honey. After the nighttime face wash, I smear on a quarter sized amount all over my face and let it sit there for 10 minutes while I walk around the house scaring my impressionable children. After the allotted waiting time, wash it off with plain ol water and behold the beautious glow erupting from your Newly-youthful cells.

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  116. Coconut oil is my go to. Love it. But you have intrigued with this talk of Marie and Sophie oil. If I win, I'll give it a whirl 😘

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  117. i turned thirty seven 4 years ago, and my face changed. i swear. it's gotten worse every year since then. wrinkles.
    wrinkles suck.

    anyway, do you SWEAR that scrubbing my face with baking soda and that oil is the game changer?

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  118. I recently found out the whole oil dissolves oil thing too! I use baking soda with Bobbi Brown cleansing oil but the price is truly gasp-worthy! I may have to try out the Maddie & Sophie cleanse oil because I am gluten free & love natural products. Thanks for the tips!

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  119. I swear by Nerium AD. It's made a huge difference in the texture of my skin and in my wrinkles! {And I didn't get wrinkles until my mid30s and it was horrifying}

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