Wednesday, December 31, 2014

On Freedom. And Farm Kitchens.

Can I just tell you how blown away I am over your kindness and sisterhood regarding my last post? There was a bit of deliberation over whether or not I would leave comments open on that one. The fear was that I would somehow end up being praised, or that it'd leave me with some sort of weird pride, or (and this one was mine) that haters would show up in droves.

When it comes to really BIG posts, I often seek advice from a trusted few, and in this case, I went against their popular opinion. I left the comments open, and I had my reasons. The main reason? You. Me. You + Me. You + You. We're a community here. A neighborhood. And I love sitting back and watching you love each other well. We do that by sharing. By opening up. By loving one another the best way we can. By giving the credit to God, the only one who makes us worthy and whole. The point of my post - all my posts - is that silence keeps us apart. I wasn't concerned about the pride thing, because honestly, I'm just barely on this side of shame. (All I could think (with a grin) to that concern was, "You've obviously never been through this." :) ) Plus, as my friend Jami so wisely put it, "The pride's already in us." Good grief. Stick a fork in me with that truth. I sadly don't need blog comments to keep my pride fat and happy. It's in me, wedged in with a bunch of other crap. It exists and even thrives entirely apart from you, apart from this blog, apart from my wonky reputation or anything else. I'm human, so it's just here.

Mostly-mostly, I wanted all of the other Me's out there to read your words. I wanted them to see the love poured out to me, because it also flows to them by default (just as all our judgmental words about other people's sin hits those struggling with similar sin square in the heart, but that's another post.) This is a community rich with support, truth, and grace. I'm more honored than ever to call you mine.

Moving on!


We got home an hour or so ago after being gone for five days, on this, December 30th, and I immediately did the following:
1) Wanted to drop kick our Marilyn Monroe-shaped Christmas tree
2) Had the random urge to rip a non-Christmas related wreath off the toy room wall
3) Unpacked my entire suitcase (this is legendary. it usually takes 2-5 days.)
4) Put steel cut oats in the slow cooker for tomorrow because all I've eaten for 2 weeks is crack bark and tortilla chips
5) Wrote a meal plan - heavy on the veggies (see above)
6) Vowed to spend Friday cleaning and organizing the basement

Could I possibly be more predictable? Should I go ahead and sleep in a sports bra so I'm that-much-readier to exercise in the morning? Should I start smoking tonight so I can quit tomorrow and round this whole thing out?

I'm just ready for a fresh start. In almost all the ways. Or at least half of them.

I didn't really plan my BIG HAIRY DEAL post as a "Fresh start" sort of post, but hot dang, I feel so FREE!!!!!!!!!!!! And now I'd like my house to be free of all of Scandinavia, my kitchen to be free of any chocolate less than 70% cocoa, my waist to be free of the current bondage of my formerly "best fitting" jeans, and my floors to be free of every Lego and every Rainbow loom band. Selah.

Related: Silas received the following for Christmas from various sources: 1 extension cord, 1 "disco ball that goes in the bath tub", 1 table-top disco ball lamp, 1 set of water/light speakers, 1 goose neck desk lamp, 2 reels of ACTUAL outdoor Christmas lights, and 1 clamp-on light with a remote control that changes THE COLOR OF THE BULB.

Help me, Rhondas.

Actually, this might calm us all down a bit:

This is my old kitchen, back on the farm.
Some of you recognize it. Hi, old kitchen! You're so clean and oddly sterile! In this exact moment, I miss you a little!

I recently had the opportunity to write a buyer's guide for Ebay on how to decorate/renovate a home on the cheap. This was a no-brainer for me, because most of the kitchen was bought on Ebay. True story.

They paid me to write said buyer's guide, and I'm not supposed to blog about it, but it seemed timely, like maybe some of you are feeling the urge to sweep everything into the garbage and start over. If that's you, have a look. It was fun to write something in a totally different style and super fun to remember those days of yore.

(I remember this day so clearly. I looked out from the bathroom and got so lovey-dovey about the view that I grabbed the camera. Not gonna lie, life was peaceful back then...)

(Help! I'm feeling nostalgic and coveting peonies in late December!!!!!)

Speaking of nostalgia, this popped up when I was searching for old kitchen photos:

Oh my gosh. Stop it. This was taken in my parents' kitchen. My childhood home! In Spring!
He had a faux hawk! He was eating one of those sick, grimy biscuit/dog treats!
This was probably within a couple months of bringing him home!


I really need to stop while I'm only this far behind.
I still have an entire day left of 2014. Who knows what might happen!

 *To see the original post I wrote about the farm kitchen (back in 2009!), click here.