Thursday, October 16, 2014

What It Feels Like To Fall

My neighborhood has never been more beautiful than it is today.
After two rainy days, the leaves are putting on a show. Almost every tree is on fire, brash and brazen and daring any of us to believe God doesn't care. Just one look out the window and we know better.

I rushed out the door this morning to spend an hour in Silas's kindergarten class. The sky was still netted in fog, the kind of beauty that makes you stare, the kind that could turn us all into poets.

I wished for my camera. I framed the image in my mind, clicked just once on the shutter. By the hour's end, the fog had lifted, but I had seen that romance out past the glass. I had noticed. And so had some of the kiddos. Documented or not, it was real. And, I think, personal.

This is who God is.
This is how He loves us.

Cory and I have been spending our evenings talking about this new stirring in our hearts. God is moving here. He keeps showing up in the wildest ways in our little neighborhood, in the school, in jail. Our neighbors and Cory's friends are God's beloved, and we watch Him gather us all up together.

We're family, and He wants us to really believe it, but more than that, He wants us to live like it.

We spent the summer resting in what simply is. We finally understood God was going to have to do the negotiating and all the heavy lifting. We are driven to the hurting and the forgotten, yes, but it's up to Him to piece us all together and direct our paths, because if left up to us, the whole thing hits the concrete in shards of pride, pity, duty, and resentment.

(Can you tell we've walked this sidewalk before?)

Lately, people are coming our way. They're finding us. We're finding them. We pray to stay soft to opportunity and suddenly, the connecting part almost feels easy. All we've done is wait while we live.

But I'm that maple leaf, clinging to the limb. I don't want to fall.
I get nervous and guarded. I trade my fear of being pushy for a refusal to move at all.

This weekend, we're clipping a line.
We're choosing vulnerability and butterflies.

For over a year, we've had a dream that sounds small but feels really big.
The clock ticking, we pulled it together in a rush, knowing in the corners of our hearts it might be a pathetic failure.

The good news is, we're starting to view "failure" quite differently. Maybe taking the leap is all the "success" we need right now.

My neighbors and I, we have things in common: we need to experience the love of Jesus to survive. We need to know it's real. We need reason to believe we haven't burned up all our chances.

That's the best place to start.

If you could, say a prayer for us on Saturday.

I'm' not even sure how to tell you to pray. We just want to see the love of God move among His people. We want it to float on the breeze and fall around our friends' ankles in heaps of can't-miss-it color until they know it was meant just for them.

Thank you so much, friends.

ps - I still need to hear from 7 of the Goodwill winners! :)


  1. Praying now... and will pray then, too! God rewards the Risk, my friend! Lean in!

  2. Praying!! Excited for what God is doing in your hearts and community!!

  3. Praying, friend.
    {you're not going to get all wild and crazy and plant a church are you? because this whole post read like something I've lived...}

    1. No, no! Haha
      We're putting down roots in the little church that has been here forever. There's no way we could do it better.
      But yes, our lives and thoughts to seem to run on the same track. Fo sho.

  4. whatever it is, i am praying for you and your family. and your neighbors and whoeverelse (i made a new word) will be impacted by this new whateveritis.
    sending some invisible hugs to the ones in your home who like them, and a high five or something to the non-huggers.
    may you continue to sense and obey whateveritis/whoeveritis God is moving you toward.

  5. What a privilege to go to the throne room on your behalf. May God take each dream and stretch it to the max, allowing His favor to shine fully upon your efforts for His Kingdom.."Enlarge your house; build an addition. Spread out your home, and spare no expense!"Isaiah 54:2,,,,fall from that tree sweet maple leaf and let Him do His work in you and through you! So excited!!!!

  6. I get all teary-eyed when the Spirit is thick & reading this got me all teary. I know God is orchestrating something beautiful. Eager for it to unfold. XO

  7. Beautiful thoughts and pictures. Definitely will be praying for your next leap! Even falling on your face is still moving forward girl! Go get 'em! Can't wait to hear all about it!. Thanks for taking the time to share all the things God lays on your heart.

  8. I am taking a page from your book Shannan, and commenting here. I follow you, but am not usually commenter. Wanted to let you know that there's one more prayer going up for you and yours as you approach the weekend!

  9. were on my mind as i purchased 1/2 price brand new clothes @ the 2nd hand store. Dept store donated 'leftover' shorts and they were 1.00 a pice BUT God knows our need and meets us...they were .50cents and a
    size 28 waist. Thank you for FALLING n love with Jesus. This. FALL. IS. Breathtaking.

  10. Set a reminder to pray on Saturday. Can't wait to see what God has in store!

  11. You got it... if the leap is moving to UT to plant a church, then I'll double down for you. ;)

  12. praying now and then and always!

  13. These Fall pictures are lovely. :)

  14. Absolutely I'll keep you in my prayers. I love what you said "Maybe taking the leap is all the success we need right now."

  15. Your neighborhood sounds just like mine this morning up here in Michigan!! Trees on fire with color and that fog! Oh how he loves us indeed! Will be praying for you and your tribe... Saturday is going to be can't-miss-it fabulous!! I'm one of those barely ever commenters but I need to tell you that I think your totally rad!!


  16. I'm totally moved right now {whilst having my morning cup of joe, still blinking the sleep out of my eyes}, totally FEELING your words! I'm praying for you and God's Hand to be present!

  17. I can't wait to hear (read) all about your newest dream and adventure! I just know it will be a huge success. Whatever the outcome I am so proud of you for doing things that are hard and cause you to be vulnerable. It is never easy to "clip a line" but the possibilities it brings could be awesome! HUGS!

    ***Is it weird that I hear YOUR voice when I read your posts even though I have no idea what your voice sounds like? :o) (Say, "No, that's not weird at all.")

    1. It's not weird at all, and I assure you the voice in your head is more soothing than the voice I actually possess. :)

  18. How fun to participate in the "FALL"! Just one of the super cool aspects of belonging to the family of God. I'm new to your blog and find it so refreshing and real. Thank you for loving Jesus and following Him into risks. "Without faith it's impossible to please God." Looks like you're stomping that out right well! Prayers!