Monday, July 9, 2012

Survival of the Sweatiest

Well, we survived. Mostly intact. Indeed, we chose the three hottest days on the planet for our garage sale. But there was just no turning back, baby.

On set-up day, I found myself wandering out to the garage numerous times, whereupon I would look at the hot disorganized mess in front of me, slide slowly into a trance, then turn and head back inside. My brain underwent a rare type of paralysis induced by extreme heat and wimpy-ness.

On day one of our sale, my ankles started to swell.

On day two, I wore a sports bra under my tank top like it was a normal thing to do. Just the thought of hardware of any kind...I simply couldn't hack it.

Customers kept say, "There's a cold front coming in on Sunday!" I wanted to cut them.

But then there was this. Help me. Can your heart take the cuteness? My friend Sasha told me about the Lemon:Aid project through Bloodwater Mission so I got a kit and put the kids to work. They spent Friday morning serving up cups of Countrytime for donations. Ruby kept shouting, "Free lemonade! I mean...."


In the end, they earned $72, which will provide clean water for 72 kids for one year. It was so much fun to watch them get excited about it.  They are learning at a very young age that they have a responsibility to act on behalf of the powerless. Beautiful.

 Meanwhile, we came dangerously close to death in the tomb-like garage.
 
And now, here I sit, watching Rick Bayless make ceviche on PBS at 12:22 in the ayem. And I don't even like ceviche.

I'm terribly uncool when it comes to sushi. You just might as well know it.

Also, I've never had my eyebrows waxed. Like, ever.

I don't understand the fuss about Katy Perry.

I want people to stop picking on Jessica Simpson.

I tried to wear my apron skirt to the sale and it wouldn't zip all the way.

I need my fingernails to be short. Always, always short. When I make a fist, I must not feel them on my palm. It is imperative.

And on that note, I shall retire to my boudoire. Which reminds me: I need to tell you about the housecoat I bought at the SV.

I am old and weird.

Goodbye.