Saturday, November 5, 2011

Saturday Freeze

Cory usually doesn't up and leave us for overnights. If anyone goes, it's usually the Mama, and most of the time, the little people are with her, leaving the Daddy back to bring home the bacon.

{Total sidenote because it just sprang to mind: When I was a little girl, I thought endsmeat was a terrible dinner option, more hideous than liver and onions. (I was going to say Spam, but I rather liked Spam as a child.) "We can't make ends meet". I heard that once or twice when I was young and it didn't really scare me, it just made me think, "Crap. We can't even make endsmeat." (Or something like that. Probably not so much the "crap" part, because I wasn't allowed to say that, so I'm sure I didn't think it, either.)}

But anyway, Cory left us to fend for ourselves last night. I went to bed early. Like, 9:45 early, which is almost legendary. Looks like he's officially the one to blame for my late nights.

Won this beauty in a giveaway! Holla.

I had trouble sleeping, though. I was so shivery cold. I'm usually the one too hot at night. I got out of bed to put socks on. I curled up in a ball. I convinced myself that I was coming down with a dread disease. I dozed. I woke up thinking, "I can't believe how much warmer I am with Cory in bed. Huh."

Calvin woke up at 6:45 with a gusher of a bloody nose that lasted a strong 20 minutes.

Oh, and the thermostat read 56 degrees.

The furnace was out.

Except it wasn't out so much as it was turned off.

I'll give you one guess.

I didn't even know you could turn a furnace off.

Silas knew.

It was annoying for a minute and then sort of Pioneer-feeling.

And then just stinking cold.

But now the house is toasty warm and the kids are in bed.

We just watched the full hour of The Lawrence Welk Show, wherein Calvin announced "I like pink." I really had no idea. Ruby spent her time practicing her bow (she almost whacked her head on the coffee table at one turn) and tap dancing and Irish step dancing and gushing about the pretty girls in the pretty dresses.

(Did I just use a derivation of the word "gush" twice in one post? Intellesting.)

A lady in a Western get-up with a bright blond poodle perm took the stage singing a familiar song. Calvin yelled out, "Ruby River! That's exactly how you look when you get out of the bathtub!"


I hope and pray that the random never ends around here.

And speaking of random, please watch this. It's my favorite SNL skit of all time. It's totally clean and hilarious. (There's an ad at the beginning, but just wait it out. Totally worth it.)

Kristin Wiig is my girl crush.

It might, in fact, be 4 minutes of your life that you will never get back, but the good news is, tonight's the time change. You'll still be 56 minutes ahead.


  1. LOL! My abs hurt. Nora loved the skit--well . . . until the end when she said (with a worried look) "Mommy, that's scaaarrrrry. I need you to come observe my life for just one day and make it sound this funny. It would really help me put things in perspective.

  2. Sorry to hear about the furnace being "off"...but wouldn't ya just know that Siley would know! I laughed out loud when I read Calvin's exclamation to Ruby about she looked! Oh my word, Shannan, how blessed you are...I'm pretty sure you must be writing down these antics somewhere other than the blog because you could make a lot of money publishing a book of your beautiful threesome's antics and sayings. Gotta love kids! was the party last night?

  3. Did you have the blessed privilege of being entertained by Lawrence Welk as a child too? Tis such a shame - I really didn't care for it much, but loved the SNL version!!! I needed the laugh!
    Wow-20 minute bloody nose-sorry to hear that. That's got to be pretty rough for Calvin (mom too!). Something I was watching/reading today made me think of you and the place that you currently dwell - oh ya - it was actually just me looking at my wall and thinking about how "at home" I feel in my home. Then the questioned lingered, "If Heaven is my home, should I really feel at home here?" xoxo

  4. Oh my, our family knows the SNL skit all too well...we may have watched it a time or two;)

  5. A freezing cold rental where you have a stack of hand washed dishes in the drainer on the counter? Why is that familiar to me...

  6. You are my sunshine today. Thanks for making my laugh.

  7. Love your random! Which reminds me....
    When I was a kid my Grandma tried to help us make ends meet by giving us the endsmeat of all ends-meat! I lifted the lid on the pot only to discover a hideous white skin covered cow tongue rising in frothy rabid deliciousness! What's more my mother, bless her heart said that all roast beef was made from tongue meat. I still have trouble with Arby's!

  8. That was a good one...I had forgotten about that skit! Hope you are nice and cozy tonight Buttercup...sweet dreams!

  9. We have those cereal bowls with the built-in straws. Also, I'm sitting here eating some of your bacon-pear salad out of a ceramic candy-corn dish. How's THAT for random?

  10. P.S. Tell Becca Heartland that I love cow tongue.

  11. OMGOSH that Kristin Wiig! That was a good favorite skit of hers is the surprise party....she is so funny. So sorry about your 56 degrees! Brrrrr.

  12. Um, what would you think if I told you my husband and I heated with a wood burning stove for the first three years of our marriage? What if I told you we scrimped and saved until we could put central heat and air in our little house? What if I told you we found out later we were using the wrong thermostat to try and turn on the oil heater? Do you feel better now?

    Believe it or not, I actually saw that skit on the show. Unusual for me.

    Stay warm and random.

  13. Total sidenote....I adore the Lawrence Welk Show. When I was an assistant activities director for a convalescent home, we would watch an hour of it and have coffee or tea with shortbread cookies. That was the best no-pay job, I have ever had. Such wonderful memories.

    I'm right there with ya about the furnace. Ours is very old and probably out of date, but it fires up like a beast and warms our house to a toasty five degrees warmer in a matter of minutes.

    Happy Weekend friend.

  14. Re: Your side note. I don't believe there's anything more offensive as a 'meal' than liver. Onions or not.

    When I was a kid, my other brothers used to try to torment me by telling me we were having 'goatsize' for dinner (some midwestern form of sausage that I loved). It was years later that I realized they were saying 'Goat's Eyes.' NOW I get it. :-)

  15. HILARIOUS! I grew up watching Lawrence Welk. It was sooo glamourous when I was 5. I needed to own those dresses, you know?

    That video killed me. I think I'll have to share it with my mom.

  16. when i was little i would over hear my parents talking about how my dad might get fired. i always pictured them roasting him over a fire. scared me to death.

  17. sorry. my daughter was signed into my account. it's melissa!

  18. Crap! Can't watch the video in Canada. That Silas is a keeper.

  19. #1 - Just another reason for me to be madly in love with Silas.
    #2 - I dreamt that Calvin went to the kickboxing class with me - ergo - his nosebleed.
    #3 - I want to be Kristin Wiig when I grow up and I've been mad crushing on her for years.
    #4 - Good night, sleep tight, and pleasant dreams to you.

  20. Came across your blog during your "Letting Go" series and am so very glad. :)

    So, have you seen the SNL Lawrence Welk skits with Will Ferrell and Melissa McCarthy? Omg. Must look those up if you haven't.

  21. You really make me laugh out loud so often.

    Thanks for that!!

    Did I also notice you using "holla" above?


    I also appreciated your memory of thinking "crap! we can't even make endsmeet!" I had sooo many similar experiences as a child. Assuming I knew what a word meant and being way off.

    Silas turned the furnace off? Es no bueno. I get hot and cold when I sleep so I often put socks on..only to take them put them on again. Sometimes one sock gets lost in the whole maneuver to be found days later...sometimes I wake up with one sock half on. I'm a lazy sleeper, I guess?

    Calvin's comments to Ruby always crack me up. I love random. My nephew was doing that on Friday at the Mall of America. We ate at his fave..Rainforest Cafe. Convos went like this "Emerson..what's your favorite thing about third grade so far?" Emerson: "Do you know where that puffer fish is?" Me: "What do you think you want for christmas?" Emerson: "I really need to know why that piranha isn't in that tank!"

    Kristen Wiig: LOVE her!! Did you ever see her with Will Ferrell in the Lawrence Welk Skit from last year? Genius. Can't seem to find it right now, but please enjoy this AND if you haven't, see Bridesmaids, it's hilarious!!

    Holla and Happy Sunday!!!


  22. Can someone explain the joke of the tiny hands of Kristen Wiig's character?
    My family carries the gene which causes Ectrodactyly and hand deformities just aren't funny to us.

  23. i talk in my sleep. i also walk in my sleep. as a girl i was often the culprit of turning the ac/heat off in the middle of the night;)

    sorry for calvin's bloody nose! bless his sweet soul.

    i would rush to get a bath on saturday nights-hated baths-put on my "fancy"-a silky nightgown, and dance and bask in the goodness of lawrence welk and his gang. i thought it was because it was, yes?

    that skit is a fave;) have you seen the "classic peg" skit? justin timberlake, kristin takes place in a target and it is excellent. also it's an accurate depiction of our target here.

    love you, miss you.

  24. I love Kristen Wiig!!! We are twins. Twins I tell you. Sam is into locking the front door randomly throughout the day. How do they figure this stuff out?? :)

  25. reading about your life makes me happy! and that was funny SNL!

  26. okay, i loved your "letting go" series, but i really missed your randomness and here it is in full swing and it's tremendous. especially love the part about "ends meet" :)

  27. Laughing so hard. Thank you for sharing that!

  28. my sister and i love those skits.
    we watch them and roll on the floor laughing.
    love this post.

  29. Hi, Finally found out how to do this from Maggie. So I want to say I loved your letting go series, I have been in an elective class at church "Living More with Less" and when the chapt. on Money came up I copied yours and read it to the class, no names of course. I don't think it took but it did with me. Todays blog, hoq do you kssp your humor, its endearing, and your kids are original, love Ruby River. Ann Schrock

  30. we've had similar experiences with the furnace....glad it was a cheap (free) fix! and watching lawrence welk with the kids - my son says he likes pink too...oh boy

  31. Oh my, you make me laugh (thanks- I needed it). Lord, I hated Lawrence Welk, it was on every day after school when we were kids... but the skit is hilarious!!

    My oldest, now 8, tunred off our heat in our old house- it looked like a light switch... which of course he found in the random spot on the ceiling in the basement. Now, we have our thermostats set at 62- brrrrrrrrrrrrrr- but we have a woodstove. I end up wearing shirts and sweaters and fleeces- and my kids run around in T-shirts and no socks!! Guess they really are Mainers... not me, thank you very much!!

  32. Okay that SNL skit is awesome! It is a family favorite here! We sing that song all the time. In fact I call myself Judice (or whatever her name is) because I have the same forehead, or "fivehead" as it were. As soon as you mentioned Lawrence Welk earlier in the post, that SNL skit popped in my head, and there you had it! I think we'd get along quite like peas + carrots, you + I.

  33. Oh, this made me laugh! I don't know what it is about Lawrence Welk and his friends, but if I happen to see it for a second on Sat., I can't turn away! And my sweet children are completely creeped out. Thanks for the giggle this afternoon. :)

  34. you are so much awesome. mornings like this, i just want to drive on up and hug you around your middle (or maybe jump on a chair and hug you normal-like).

  35. I'm kinda been MIA lately. Mostly because I feel I have nothing interesting to share. My blog got really slow for whatever reason so I haven't touched it in months. Plus, I was letting blog-watching consume my life to the point that I couldn't get things that needed to be done, done. But, I truly have missed your blog! And you are STILL cracking me up.