2. Hawk any and all crayons in the red/pink family.
3. While you're at it, grab anything orangey or purplish, because variety is the spice of life and the spice of Valentine's Day. (Feel free to send that one off to Hallmark. It's on the house.)
4. Strip those suckers down to their birthday suits.
5. Take 35-50 photographs of the vibrant crayons juxtaposed on your white, well-patinaed table.
6. Consider the fact that "well-patinaed" just doesn't look like a word.
7. Decide, as always, that if it pops up when you Google it, it must be right. It must.
9. Push buttons on your husband's camera that you do not remotely understand.
10. Pray that he forgets to read your blog today.
11. Get out the sharpener and get. to. work.
12. Pull out that cute, vintage mini-muffin tin and separate all of your luscious crayon shavings by color group, because that's just the kind of girl you are.
13. Take 15-25 photos of piles of wax.
14. Daydream about what it would be like to nap upon a pillow of Tickle Me Pink.
16. Cover the ironing board with an ugly towel, because this craft bleeds coolness.
17. Pull out the waxed paper and tear a few long sheets.
18. Sprinkle shavings between two pieces.
19. Iron 'em up.
20. Cool 'em down.
21. Using a Sharpie, free-hand a bunch of hearts all over your cooled-off pretties. Different shapes, different sizes, different personalities.
22. Cut like you mean it.
23. Punch a hole in the top region of each heart (varying the position so some of them hang all wonky-like).
25. Hang them in a happy window at varying lengths.
26. Admire your mad skillz.
28. Realize that all of your gorgeous photographs of wax in its various states - your best work! - have been mysteriously lost forever.
29. Cry a little, at least on the inside.
30. Pick yourself back up, because Valentine's Day is officially less than one month away, and that's something to smile about.