Thursday, December 2, 2010

Kate Middleton and Soup Fit for a Queen

Two days running, I have found myself thinking about Kate Middleton whilst showering. That right there is a testament to the compromised state of my mental well-being, seeing as how I do my very best thinking in the shower.

I'm really not the Monarchy-Obsessed type. I only watched eight straight hours of footage from Princess Diana's accident. It's just that I can't stop wondering what Kate's life feels like right now. How do you know for sure that you're ready for what you're signing up for, when what you're signing up for happens to include neighboring tabloids at the check-out lane, one proclaiming you a "Perfect Princess", the other dealing out tawdry stories about "your life" without even bothering to wear a poker face?

http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00867/RSNN1517A-280_867307a.jpg

And what about those ridiculous hats she will now be expected to don with regularity? Of course, in the end, I would have worn Mother Goose on my head for ten days straight if that's what it took to make Cory mine, but I wasn't already burdened with thoughts of private security detail, a lifetime of widespread scrutiny, permanent forfeiture of public sweatpants, potentially dysfunctional in-laws, nannies for my someday-babies, head-to-toe Oscar de la Renta, and a gaudy castle that is probably buttoned up to the chin in Victorian wallpaper when what I want is whitewashed Scandanavian. Not to mention the hauntingly-documented life and death of my late Mother-in-Law.

She must really be fond of Will.

Something you should know about me is that I am an eternal-optimist when it comes to the vast majority of celebrity couples. I do not know why. But as such, I am almost always sucker-punched by celeb break-ups. I worried about Eva Longoria over my turkey dinner. I had flashbacks from a previous Thanksgiving when I actually prayed for Jessica Simpson. All of that to say - I think Kate and Will have a real chance at marital happiness. Why the heck shouldn't they? I want that for everyone. It's a thing that I believe in.

It will not come easily to them, but when does that ever happen? They will have to keep their claws sharpened for the fight. I hope they have faith to bookend their shared life, holding them tightly together.

I think one important key to her potential marital success and overall happiness is the ability to maintain a measure of normalcy, at least when she is in her own home. I hope the powers that be will allow Kate to serve her own soup and wash up the bowls when it's gone.

And speaking of soup, I discovered another long-lost soulmate last week. Her name is Italian Pasta & Bean Soup.*

Our first date showed potential, but the second time-around, with the addition of chopped fresh spinach, our fate was sealed forever.

As for you, Kate, if you ever find yourself in Indiana, come on over. Sweatpants are on the house and I'll let you serve me my dinner. You know you want to.


*I added the chopped zuchini on my own. Throw it in at the very end so it doesn't overcook. I also stirred in two hearty shakes of Italian Seasoning in lieu of the fresh parsley. And I probably doubled the garlic, cause that's just what I do.